Reflection Series - Challenges Spark Determination!

Tough times are a part of life. They give me opportunities to test my strengths. Challenges spark determination to remain standing regardless of the circumstances.

In a tightening economy, financial stability is difficult, but I remain undaunted. I try to invest wisely and spend wisely and I search for new ways to earn. When I use my natural abilities, opportunities for earning appear before me. 

When relationships are strained, I avoid giving up on them. Important bonds deserve my effort to maintain.

I am determined to set aside my pride in order to be fair to the people I relate to. Being mature during conflict allows a positive outcome in the end. I fight the urge to push my point of view and open myself to another person’s perspective. But sometimes I too make stupid mistakes :(

Having deadlines at work inspires me to work quickly and smartly. Even when those deadlines seem tight, I am determined to meet them.

I commit to being victorious even when the odds are against me. I know that determination produces favorable results.

Today, I push myself harder when challenges come my way. Being willing to accept and handle them shows that I am brave. I am committed to using that courage to persevere through rough times.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1.    How do I motivate myself when I am unable to see a way out of a challenge?

2.    Where do I find the courage to step in front of an intimidating barrier?

3.    In what ways do I build my determination to take on difficulties?

Mental Habits already Making you Miserable !!!

The world doesn’t make you miserable. You make yourself miserable. Avoid these mental habits and create joy, instead:

      Making assumptions. It’s too easy to assume you already know something you don’t. 

     Assumptions destroy relationships and prevent you from taking action. Get all the information  you need and do your best. Assumptions are frequently wrong.

Seeking approval from others. No matter what you do, some people will think you’re a hero and others will think you’re a bum. A healthy adult makes choices and takes actions that they believe are correct.

Comparing yourself to others. There’s always someone with a nicer car, a more attractive spouse, a better body, or a bigger paycheck. Only compare yourself to yourself. If you’re making progress overtime, you’re winning the game of life. If you’re losing ground, that’s a sign that a few adjustments are in order.

Procrastination. Time is the great equalizer. You might not have been born into a wealthy family, possess a 150 IQ, or look like a movie star. But everyone has 24 hours available each day. How you use that time determines your outcomes. Wasting time creates stress and drama that no one needs. If you procrastinate frequently, your life is less than it could be.

Indecisiveness. Indecisiveness is the ultimate form of procrastination. Choosing nothing is making a choice. It’s a choice to remain stuck and allow life to pass you by. If you’re stuck between a couple of options, just choose. One choice will prove to be as good as another.
 
If you’ve done the work to narrow your options, the worst remaining option is much better than failing to make a choice.
 
Only being satisfied with perfection. When you’re a perfectionist, nothing is ever good enough. It’s the perfect recipe for misery. Give yourself plenty of ways to be happy, not just one. The need for perfection also creates indecisiveness and leads to procrastination. Determine how well something needs to be done and make it happen.

Underestimating yourself. After a negative outcome, it’s easy to believe you’re less capable than you really are. The natural result is the lowering of your expectations in the future. When you expect less of yourself, you live a life that’s less than it could be.
 
Focus on your past successes and remind yourself of how capable you can be. Learning to walk and talk are more challenging than anything else you’ll ever accomplish. The hard part is over.

Beating yourself up. Mistakes are part of the game. Learn from them and apply the information you’ve gained. How would your life be if you never made the same mistake twice? You might think you deserved to be punished, but how is that helpful?
 
There’s good news if you’re miserable. You can blame yourself, which means that you can fix it. Poor mental habits lead to misery. A few simple changes can positively affect your happiness and mental health. Determine how your mental habits are impacting your mood and success. Make the necessary changes and enjoy a higher level of happiness.

Brain Oh Brain !!

" The mind is something that the brain creates because the mind told it to "

Through this post i want you to understand How Amazing The Brain is and also its undoubted Limitations.

I want you to realise just because your Brain tells you something, it doesn't necessarily makes it so.

A thought is a physical pathway in the brain. That’s why having the thought “Why do I suck?” is never a great idea because you start to create a self fulfilling prophecy as it becomes harder and harder to shake the belief that you suck.

 

The quality of your thoughts is highly correlated to the quality of your life.

Think great thoughts and you’re way more likely to lead a great life; it really is that simple if sometimes difficult to actually implement. As the great William James once said, “The greatest breakthrough in my life time is the realization that man can alter his life by altering his thinking.” 

Reframe negative situations, a reframe is where you decide to look at a negative situation in a more empowering light.

It doesn’t involve changing the actual event (that would be delusional) just adjusting your view of it. If you want to get good at reframing, simply ask yourself the following two questions (or whichever is most pertinent at the time) when things aren’t going to plan.

What else can this mean? What can I learn from this? 

Leaving aside degenerative brain disease, your brain never loses the ability to learn, change and adapt to new situations, because it’s effectively plastic and constantly rewiring itself depending on the context.

Leopards may indeed not change their spots, but you’re not a leopard and you can change, if you really want to that is, and your brain is up for the challenge whenever you are. 

Your brain is fairly poor at distinguishing between what’s really happening and what you are merely imagining. Which is why horror films scare people and porn films, er...ahem, well you know what I mean.

Your brain was disproportionately large compared to other organs when you were born. That’s why babies look a bit like aliens. Not yours of course, yours are cute, just other people’s babies.

Your brain just loves familiarity even to the point of preferring people with the same name as you. Weird eh?

You are more likely to prefer somebody who does the same job as you, supports the same sports team, is the same nationality, belongs to the same club or group or even has the same type of dog.

If you exercise your brain with puzzles, memory games and reading excellent self development blogs, you can continue to grow new neurons all your life. 

The reason you can’t tickle yourself is because your cerebellum knows it’s you doing the tickling and sends a message to the rest of your brain to ignore the sensation and refuses to laugh.  Try it out!

After about the age of 25 and just as we reach peak development, the brain starts slowly shrinking. Some research has suggested that the male brain shrinks faster than the female one (not a surprise to the female population). 

Set Goals that Work!

You need to know " Whats your motivation ? " What will this Goal or Goals give me ?"

Crap Reasons for setting Goals :

• I need more money

• I have to make my parents (or anybody else for that matter) proud

• I need a bigger house

• I want to show people how successful I am

• I’d like to be famous and have people adore me

The common denominator for all of the above is that they are extrinsically motivated. 

Great Reasons for Setting Goals:

• I want to leave a legacy behind me

• I want the world to be a better place

• I want to set great examples for my Kids

• I want to leave my 9 am to never ending job to lead a more balanced life/ spening more time with my loving family 

• I want to align with my Core Values

The latter is way cooler when it comes to setting goals.

So write down what you want, what you really, really want and don‟t spare the horses- 

WRITE IT DOWN !

The act of writing the goal down also does a couple of other really important things. 

Firstly it means that you actually see your goal infront of you and it looks more real.

So by writing it down you‟re concentrating your focus and demonstrating the importance to your unconscious as well as making sure you don‟t forget the goal. 

There is a process called the 3 P‟s in goal setting and it stands for Personal, Present Tense & Positive. 

Personal means it has to be your goal and can be achieved by you.

Present Tense means the goal needs to be written as though it has already been achieved so that you create something called cognitive dissonance (more in a moment).

Positive means it has to be something you want to achieve and not something you want to avoid. 

See It, Hear It, Feel It

Sit in your favorite chair and take several deep breaths. Make sure the exhale is about 50% longer than the inhale and allow yourself to relax, When you are well chilled, I want you to imagine having your goal. I mean really imagine with all your senses.

See what you would see, hear what you would hear and allow all those emotions and feelings that go with hitting your goal to arise. Really let them build and then build some more. Know that you can have this feeling if you really want to.

Spend some time watching yourself, or if you are looking through your own eyes, seeing yourself, and see how brilliant your life is. You can even make the picture or movie bigger and brighter and see if that makes it even more appealing.

You can even try adding a motivational sound track if you like and if it makes your goal feel more attainable. There are no rules, you really can do whatever you want inside your own head without fear of repercussions.

Once you are there I want you to see yourself dealing with any potential obstacles with aplomb. Think of sticking points that may arise and visualize yourself dealing easily with them.

You can make them content free if don‟t know what they are likely to be at this stage. By that I mean, just see yourself looking confident and overcoming issues without necessarily knowing what the specifics are.

This type of visualization* is very powerful and I would recommend you do this as often as is feasible, preferably on a daily basis. A great time is first thing as you wake up or last thing before you go to sleep when your conscious mind is all dozy and won‟t insist on crashing the party and trying to be all realistic. 

  Commit     .............    Commit    ................   Commit 

                                   Whatever you Do, Just Do Something !

Use Sub Goals to Enjoy the Journey....

You all are familiar with SMART Goals- Specific, Measurable, Action Oriented, Realistic and Time bound !

Make your goals fun chasing and REWARD Yourself on achieving sub goals.

Ways to Destress Yourself!

People get stressed by work, by the kids, by their boss, by their spouse, by the sports team they follow, by the TV, by noise, by traffic, by the weather, by the Government and almost anything else you care to mention.

I am confident that you don't possess a victim mindset and you are prepared to do what you need to.

Put Yourself First : Don't take me wrong that doesn't mean you have to be selfish or uncaring.You should be the most important person to you. Family and friends may only be a whisker behind, but you're number one!

Commit to taking time out for yourself on a regular basis.

If you came to me for Life Coaching this is one of the elements that is non-negotiable.

If you aren't prepared to give yourself the support you need and deserve, then neither I nor anybody else can help you.

So before you move on, ask yourself the question “Am I the most important person in the world to me” and if the answer is anything other than “yes” you have some up front work to do, because you're wrong. 

Learn to say No !

Watch What you Put into Your Body & Exercise Regularly

Breathe Properly and Say Aaaahhhhh!!

Ask Better Questions like Who can i forgive?, Who can Help me ?, What am i truly grateful for?, What can i do to break this pattern of Behavior?

Laugh More & Get Real

Slow Down & Be in the Moment

Relax your Body & Mind!

Chunk Down - Chunking is the art of taking something that needs to be done and breaking it into easy-to- manage chunks.

If the task must be done and you can't seem to get to it, do the following:

  Remove everything else from the list

  Make a promise to a loved one to complete the task

  Ask friends and colleagues to check in with you and see how you're progressing

  Always go easy on yourself; you're doing the best you can! 

Monroe a Yogi!!

One of my friend shared Monroe's rare pictures performing various asanas and i couldn't stop writing about this International Sex Symbol who still serves as yoga inspiration today.

The smile on her face says it all " the simplicity " & "the effortless" performance as a Yogi. Clearly Monroe was an early follower of Yoga. This side of her we have rarely seen !!

We all have something that we are finding in ourselves and yoga helps us to overcome those imperfections and restore ourselves.

Yoga as a way of Life helps us to be full of Life  ( Prana ) which is so evident in Monroe's rare album of being a BadAss Yogi!!

I take her as my inspiration to be perfectly posed and beautiful while performing asanas!! And be as Charming as her to keep inspiring people after Seven Decades !!!

Forward Bend

Boat Pose

Shoulder Stand

Shoulder Stand

Sarvangasana

Bow Pose